Comforting Coincidences

We felt so blessed to have two beautiful daughters, three-and-a-half-year-old Isabelle and one-year old Sophia, in our lives. At times, when my husband and I would see the two girls play with each other we would whisper,

“Life doesn’t get any better than this!” We truly enjoyed the challenges of day to day life with our young family.

We were devastated by Sophia's death and grappling with how this beautiful, healthy child could be with us one day and simply vanish the next day. Since her death, however, I believe that she provides signs of her gentle presence to comfort us.

The Visit

• About a month after Sophia died, her father Michael started back on his weekly travel schedule. I was a little bit apprehensive about managing life with our older daughter Isabelle while grieving and coming to terms with our new reality — a family of three here on earth. Soon after Michael left for the airport at 5 am, I went back into a hazy sleep and then felt an incredible presence. I saw Sophia pull herself up to the side of my bed. She was wearing her light green one-piece pajamas, and had her sweet, precious smile on her face. When I extended my hand to her face it was warm and so welcoming. She seemed to be saying, “I am OK, Mom. You can sleep now.” And, for the first time since Sophia passed away I was able to enter into a more peaceful sleep.

The Feather

• It was Easter morning, our first since Sophia died. I woke up that morning sobbing. I missed my little girl so much. I went to the kitchen to start getting breakfast moving and looked out the window. I was thinking of Sophia, and a tiny feather danced down from the sky. I noticed it but went onto other things. When it was time for us to go to the Easter morning services, we all went outside. As I was waiting for the car to come out of the garage, I was thinking of Sophia and the feather. I looked down on the ground and before me appeared the tiny two-inch feather. Again, I feel as if she were saying “I am with you on this day.”

The Stars

• My friend created Isabelle’s Dream, a beautiful story about the enduring love between my two daughters, Isabelle and Sophia – a bond that even Sophia’s death cannot break. In the book, Sophia’s spirit tells Isabelle,

“The two brightest stars in any night sky will be my eyes shining with love for you.”

One day we were leaving my parents’ home at night. As I was putting Isabelle into her car seat, she looked up at the stars and exclaimed, “Momma, do you think those are Sophia’s eyes?” The most amazing part of this experience is that Isabelle had yet to read the book!

The Wink

• It was another August evening, almost 9 months since Sophia had died. When I awoke the next morning I remembered a beautiful dream. Sophia was in my arms and we were admiring each other. I was so happy to have her with me and felt incredible energy between us. We were so connected and I hated the thought of having to put her in her crib for the night. While we were snuggling for a few more moments, she looked up at me and winked! What does a wink mean? It is an intimate exchange between two people suggesting a secret, a suggestion that we are “in the know.” It gives me tremendous comfort to believe that my Sophia is communicating with me on some special and significant level.

The Yellow Butterfly

• We were vacationing in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, and visited a beautiful butterfly museum. A variety of gentle and colorful butterflies flitted about the various flowers in the lush green setting. Also, we enjoyed listening to the peaceful music playing in the background. As on most days, our thoughts were not far from our Sophia. Coincidentally, as we were exiting the museum, we experienced something wonderful. The song “Danny Boy” played and a beautiful yellow butterfly fluttered across our path. My husband and I looked at each other and smiled. We had played “Danny Boy” during Sophia’s burial service, and yellow was her favorite color. Again, we truly felt she was tapping at us in a special way to signal her presence.

Isabelle looked up at the stars and exclaimed ‘Momma, do you think those are Sophia’s eyes?’

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